One Nice Thing

(This is Taylor at 1 year old.This picture makes me smile for at least a whole minute!)

I learned in counseling years ago that there is no winning in finger pointing. If I feel lonely or rejected or ugly or fat or grumpy, whatever, it's really on me. No one's choices make me act a certain way. I can make the choice to ALLOW others actions (that are out of my control) to effect me, or; I can simply not worry about them and instead do something that is in my control.

GET OFF MY BOO HOOING BUTT AND WORK ON ME!!

Today I am choosing to do one nice thing for each member of my family. It's something that I know will help me to be more thoughtful of my them and remind me to enjoy each day with them. I've got to start with Bruce because if dad's not happy...:( I'm going to put nice clean linens on the bed, write him a flirty little love note to leave on his pillow and then.......heehee! For Spencer, I'm going to take him on a bike ride after school. He loves that and will be really excited. Taylor, she's going to get extra snuggle & story time tonight. She's more affectionate than the boys and craves attention at bedtime. Cameron is the twirp. He cracks me up all the time. His idea of something special is buying candy, gum or a toy. That's not going to work for me because I'm trying to not give praise to my kids with monetary items for awhile. I want them to learn to work for money and save for purchases. So, instead, I will be treating Cameron to an unexpected lunch date. We're going on a picnic and leaving right away. He will LOVE it!! Cooper, well, he gets enough breastfeeding to make any guy over the moon. What's better than that??



It's going to be a great day!

Patience...

...a virtue I do not seem to possess. But, nonetheless, I was asked to give a lesson today at church in Relief Society (that's the name of our women's organization/class). It was based on a fabulous talk given at our last general conference by President Uchtdorf. I love his talks. It was given to the men of our church but it really applies to us all. In the spirit of renewal & strengthening our marriages, here it is for you to read and ponder. Patience, in addition to a weed warmer, will help save the world.

(This is Cameron a few years ago. If only he stayed like this all the time; Patience would come much easier.)

P.S. Yet another great photo from my friend Nicolette!

The Weed Warmer

(Bruce & I on our wedding day, August 15, 1998)

It came to me during a recent conversation with my mom. We were talking about my parents upcoming wedding anniversary. My parent will have been married for 34 years. I've always feared when thinking about them that they are surviving more than than they are enjoying life. Our youngest in turning 11 soon and before you know it she'll be gone and my parents will find themselves without children.....in their late 60's. Imagine having nonstop child-rearing for 40+ years....Yikes!! So, I remembered a story my mom told me when I moved out of their home at 18 and gave me a huge quilt that had always been around the house. This was a special quilt, nicknamed "The Weed Warmer". She made it for my dad very early in their relationship and it was carried around in the back of the car so that wherever they found themselves parked, they could have a cozy spot to sit.....or lay!!! Excuse the pun. (Ok, I have to say that was totally my own deliberate pun that I'm sure my mom won't appreciate and I am NOT saying there was ever any public laying. Although, I hear it's the spice of life. We all know how my mind works.) Anyhow, I moved out with the weed warmer and as the years have passed it was layed to rest without ever being replaced. So, while on the phone with my mom, I had a brilliant gift idea...She needs to make my dad a new weed warmer....Plan a special date night, put it in the trunk with a big bow, pack a picnic, pull up to the park at 11pm like some 17 year old hormonal teenagers and park. Then she can give him the new weed warmer. Let them do what they may with it but I truly believe this would add spice to my mother & fathers' life. And believe me, they could use some! Bruce's birthday is in October....I think he would love a weed warmer....in camo print.

I told my mom, while on the phone, my idea. She laughed. I think she's considering it. She would be smart to do it. I'll leave it up to her. But, what I did realize was that in addition to giving some much needed gift advice, I was also receiving some much needed inspiration for my blog. It hit me then, my current season in life is leaving me overwhelmed & tired. Bruce & I are trying to make time to be together WITHOUT kids. It's tough. But you have to not give up. Wouldn't it be fabulous to blog about our dates, dates I hear about from others, great gifts for your hunky man, etc.? I'm taking it upon myself to do my part in making the world a better place; by rescuing the boring & lonely hearted couples. So, please email me any experiences you have had or ideas....For my circle of people, creative & inexpensive goes along way. Although, I like to be swanky from time to time to. Until next time, make your hubby his own Weed Warmer...Bet you won't feel so boring!!

Hope It's Worth the Wait

Finally, I have a worthwhile post! I miss my blog...but it was too much to worry about.

This is Cooper Daniel Anderson.
He came out like a lightning bolt on Friday, March 19, 2010.
Weighing in at 8 lbs 9 oz, 20 3/4 inches.

And I've fallen in love all over again.

(Pictures courtesy of Nicolette's Photography.)

I love, love, love this picture of me pregnant.
And I love my hair.
And my necklace.

My absolute favorite picture.....I don't take my shirt off for just any boy.
This boy is that special.

Mostly, I love being a mother to these adorable 4.

What Was On My Mind Last Night

I'm now 37 weeks. I realized last night that I have no pictures of myself pregnant this time. I also realized I haven't taken ANY pictures since I got pregnant. Which means, as much as I thought I could never do it, I've become like so many mothers of multiples. You give the youngest children the short stick. My mom did it. I've always been a little irked by the things my younger siblings get away with or are allowed to do that would have gotten me grounded for weeks on end. Yet, as I think on this new revelation of my neglect to my kids, I wonder if they go hand in hand. You feel so guilty about robbing them of cherished, priceless memories of their childhood that you compensate by letting them get away with too much in the later years. Or, more likely is that in making peace with your neglect and accepting that while it isn't fair, it doesn't make you a bad mother; you then make peace with letting other things go....like the age restriction on shaving legs or wearing mascara or calling boys on the phone. I don't know. I do feel bad for Cameron. Bruce has issues about having little photos of his life. He was the 5th and final child. He also ran wild as a teen. I'm really hoping I haven't created a monster in not taking photos for the last 37 weeks. And, I really better make sure I know where the camera is and that it's charged with a empty memory card or I very well may miss taking pictures of this next child's birth....what would that mean? Serial killer? Bank robber? I'm going to go now and make sure the camera is located and ready to shoot.

Trials

I'm trying to get back into this blogging thing. I do miss it. The timing of and the actual pregnancy have been a trial for me. Nothing to worry about with the baby or me. We've both been perfectly fine. I'm just a person that hates any discomfort and whines about it. My absence from blogging has been a direct result of this. I don't want to be the person that bitches all the time. (I know I should probably word that differently to both be a more virtuous woman and to be respectful of readers that don't appreciate my mouth. But I'm in no mood to impress or worry about propriety.)

Here I sit tonight, to blog once again. Finally, a life lesson that is blog worthy. Very real and still somewhat witty.(At least I think it is.)

I can't get into to all my woes. Too many details that don't need to be shared. Some insignificant, while others are truly a mess. Nothing life threatening. Just extremely stressful and at times humiliating. I've had many days of feeling all dignity stripped from me. The funny part of it is that I have no qualms about indignity when I volunteer it. It's when it's forced upon me that I have trouble with.

Here's the background. Bruce & I have been dealing with alot of financial stress. As is everyone else I know. Being pregnant on top of it has made it more difficult to cope. My house is a mess because I can't muster the energy to do more than 1 small thing before I have to sit. I can hardly bend over. My varicose veins are getting to be quite painful. My feet are swollen and numb. I'm not sleeping, etc., etc. What can I say? I'm having a rough time.

WARNING: here comes the gross & shameless part. About 2 weeks ago I had a new trial arise. One so terribly awful that it had me contemplating taking some very extreme measures. For the first time in my life, I busted out a new friend, HEM!! You know the one, nickname for hemorrhoid. I've always loved that saying, "You're like a pimple on my arse....I pop you but you just keep coming back." No, No....the better effect would come from a hemorroid analogy. I've never had so much havoc to my rear end. Even during giving birth to Spencer, as I was yelling that he's coming out my a@! like some lunatic, it was better than this. At least then, it was over after a few hours. This was constant for 2 weeks. This trial was so horrendous for me that when, after much drama, ranting,a box of wet wipes and a very indecent examination from a very cute doctorish type person; it miraculously went away, I felt a new lease on life. All the trials from financial to constipation to my not so friendly anaconda in the jungle to the crazy facial hairs to my sausage toes became manageable and almost nice. It's funny how trials feel so terrible & overwhelming....then that nasty hemorroid bangs down you're back door and teaches you that you really are being watched over and things could be oh so much worse. And that my friends, turns "HEM" into a real friend....a real blessing of sorts.